CHAPTER 328

My head rested on my palm as drowsiness began to creep in, the steady drone of the teacher's voice blending with the rhythmic ticking of the clock, the frantic clicking of laptop keyboards, or the scratching of pen on paper. Below me was the book for this course dad had bought me, and I had a few notes scribbled down on a notebook about different musical symbols and whatnot. This place was pretty full for a summer class. By my count, there were twenty-two people here, all teenagers.

"Let's pause here," Ms. Arden said, her tone gentle but firm as she closed the large book of sheet music resting on the piano. The students looked up, some blinking as if emerging from a trance. "You've all done wonderfully so far. I know this can feel like learning a new language—and in many ways, it is—but you're already starting to grasp it."

She walked over to the board, where a simple staff with a few notes had been drawn. "We'll take a short break now. When we come back, we'll start putting what we've learned into exercise at the piano. But before you go," she paused, letting the silence settle, "while you're on break, I want you to think about what you've just learned. Imagine the notes, see them on the staff, and try to hear them in your mind. And it's ten minutes, not one more! If you're late, you aren't getting back in."

Ms. Arden was an interesting teacher. In her forties, shorter than me and a little puffy like a Dedenne, but stern enough to have garnered a reputation among those who'd taken her classes before. She wasn't just a really good piano player, a professional who often played at huge venues for the highest echelons of society; she also played the violin, the harp and the cello. She moved over to the whiteboard to erase some of the notes she'd taken.

Most students filtered out of the room. Some had their Pokemon with them— a boy with a Starly sleeping on his head as if it was her nest. Another with an Aipom who Ms. Aiden had forced back into his Pokeball after the normal type had sown too much chaos in class and thrown a bunch of paper balls at a girl's Kricketot who'd been just as interested in learning as she was. I would have had Angel here had he not been far too large for the classroom. He certainly would have enjoyed it. Instead, Mimi was soundly sleeping around my wrist.

I wonder what Lehmhart would have said if he'd been here. My fist clenched around the fabric of my jeans under my desk, and I held my breath until the hurt passed.

"Sheesh, it's a summer class! She should relax a little bit. You'd think we're taking exams next class." A girl to my right snickered at her own remark.

Her name was Jess. She wasn't really a friend—this was only my second class here, which was way too early for that—but I'd consider her a classroom acquaintance. She had light brown skin and super long tresses. Her parents were apparently Alolan and had come to Sinnoh this January. Usually, you heard about people moving to Alola, not from there, but at least it meant that she was totally tuned out of the trainer culture here. The main reason we'd kind of bonded was because one, she'd sat next to me and just decided to talk, and two, she had no idea who I was.

In the first day of class, numerous students had grouped around my table when I'd arrived. The most all of them could ask were questions about fame, or corny things about how they liked the way I fought because it was entertaining on TV. They were fans, so I responded as best I could, but the image they had of me was just not at all who I was. They saw me as this cool, calm and collected girl who was as as brutal as possible to make sure she'd obtain victory at all costs. Only the last bit of that was true.

I assumed those who vehemently disagreed with that assessment already wanted nothing to do with me. They'd gone for someone else instead: the other acquaintance I'd made, though I hadn't paid any attention to what they'd asked.

She was—

"You're far too easygoing," Marley nearly murmured. "You're sending your laziness my way; it's contagious."

"That's how we do it back in the islands. You should try it for a change, Marles." Jess put her feet up on her table, leaned back against her chair and winked at her.

Marley was kind of the other side of the coin. Thin, the kind of pale that got sunburned by spending an hour in the sun, timid, and nearly always quiet. She was a diligent student whose pages were somehow filled with notes even though this was the second class of this summer course. I was pretty sure she was studying on her own time as well. We'd literally just begun and there was like no material we'd seen. Marley was just the kind of person to look ahead in the book before the teacher even got there.

She gave me rich girl vibes with how this was the second time she'd come here in extravagant dresses, but from what I knew, she actually lived in the rougher parts of the city and commuted here via bus. I'd never even seen her with a phone. She had short black hair parted a little to the side and seemingly always had a ribbon somewhere in there. Today's was white and on the side of her head.

"Please don't call me that." Her voice was a little deep— especially whenever she got loud. I noticed her flush in embarrassment, as she always did whenever her tone slipped. Sometimes, I'd see her open her mouth, consider saying something, but shut down with a saddened look.

She probably had a lot more to say a lot of the time, but just didn't like the sound of her own voice. Part of me wanted to call Melody to give her advice, but I just didn't know Marley that well, and I didn't know if she'd be offended or something. I'd had enough of accidentally hurting people.

"Fine. Marley," Jess enunciated the word in an obnoxious way. She probably hadn't caught it, since she didn't seem like the kind of girl to pay attention to her surroundings. "It's a cute nickname. What do you think, Graces? Oh, never mind, she's back on her phone again."

"Hm? Oh, I mean I'm just here to pass the time," I said as I scrolled through my messages.

"You're in a classroom with one of the best musicians in Jubilife, and you're here to pass the time?" Jess raised an eyebrow, holding it there for a few seconds and snorted. "You're weird."

"I mean, I do want to learn the piano—" a smile crept up my face when I saw Maylene had messaged me. She hadn't been sure if she'd be able to make it today because of work, but she had managed to finish most of what she needed to do today.

She wouldn't be picking me up or anything. She was still a Gym Leader, and it was bad optics to have her just walk the streets, having fun in public, while many people were still having a tough time in hospitals or had lost loved ones. Instead, she'd be discreetly Teleported to my apartment complex, where we would hang out for an hour and a half and practice. More complicated plans would have to wait at least another week.

"Secret boyfriend, ain't it?" Jess shot Marley a look, and my mood immediately soured. "Okay, I guess not?"

Marley cleared her throat. "You should learn to keep your mouth shut once in a while," she said, her confidence now returned. "Also, stop leaning back like that; you're going to fall."

For once, Jess listened. And when I said for once even though I'd only known this girl for one class and a half, I meant it. She was… a little annoying, if a little fun as well. Obviously, I wouldn't have stuck around if I hadn't liked her. Plus, she was kind of the glue between me and Marley. There was often this dynamic in school groups where if one person left, the others suddenly didn't know what to talk about and just shuffled there awkwardly until they returned.

I had been the victim of this too many times to count. Hell, last time when we'd just met each other, Jess had kind of decided that we were her friends now. She'd left to go to the bathroom while we'd been talking about our history with the piano after class, and it had literally happened.

"Can't stick around after class this time," I said. "I've got to do stuff."

"I get it. You trainers are always too busy for us civvies," Jess lamented with sarcasm dripping into her words. "I'll just stick around with Marley so we can bond over how we're going to practice—" I felt my heart jump at the word, "—the piano together and leave you behind in the dust while you go do whatever."

Marley shook her head as she pulled a simple spam sandwich from her backpack. "No. I have to go train, too. I've been slacking off too much lately." She began to eat at it, taking bites so small I wasn't sure she'd be done before the break ended.

I blinked. Marley was a trainer? She didn't seem like the type, but that had been my fault for judging a book by its cover. It was difficult to imagine a frail girl like her going out in the wild for days on end, but then again, my picture of what a normal Pokemon journey was like was colored by my own experiences. You could pretty easily go through Sinnoh without many problems if you knew the places to avoid and waited to go there until your team was powerful enough. And maybe she was like Erin, only going to the outskirts of her city.

Or maybe she was super famous and that was why people had swarmed around her on the first day as well. I did assume she was well-known, but not because she was a trainer. Maybe she played another instrument, or she modeled or something.

Meh. What were the odds, right? Looking at her again, she didn't finish her sandwich, instead deciding to save the other half for later.

While these two were just casual acquaintances— maybe loose friends—who most likely weren't going to last in the long run, dad had been right when he'd said this would help. My new therapist (who I had only seen once so far) had said the same thing. Sometimes, it was good to just be struggling to stay awake in class and to be bored out of your mind learning sheet music instead of actually playing the instrument I'd signed up for instead of spiraling like I had been before the ceremony.

I was still ugly inside, concealed beneath a veneer of smiles and pretenses. These people just remained blissfully unaware and looked at me like I was normal. The effort to maintain this façade was suffocating, leaving me feeling queasy as I forced myself to fit in as if I wasn't a scar etched upon the world. Maylene was the only one who could see my real self without feeling disappointment—in the case of my friends—or disgust in the case of these two girls.

And probably Cecilia.

"Are you okay, Graces?" Jess worryingly asked. "You sick? I can take you to the infirmary."

"I'm fine. Thanks."

It was going to be okay. I would see her soon.

—

My Hero had been waiting by my door, chatting with her Medicham. Even though this was our third session, seeing her in casual clothing was still strange. The only other time it had happened was when we'd gone to the gym—that was one of our planned sessions eventually since there was no point in not being consistent with working out. Maybe she'd wear the same clothes. Thinking back, that crop top looked really good on her. And those yoga pants... would it be fine to ask her to wear them again?

Today, Maylene wore a simple, fitted gray tank top that showed off her toned arms; baggy shorts with a deep shade of blue that hung just above her knees; well-worn sneakers with plenty of use, which was kind of charming due to the fact that I got easily attached to things too. She could have had a new pair with her Gym Leader salary, but here she was, wearing these.

Ah, but she'd seen me coming. Casually inserting myself once there was a lull in the conversation wasn't going to work.

Maylene had already been smiling at some joke Medicham must have made, but there was something different about the way she looked at me. I knew what it was, of course, but one couldn't help but notice. Denying I'd missed someone looking at me that was a fool's errand.

"There you are," she said.

"Hey. Sorry, Ms. Arden kept rambling for an extra ten minutes." Luckily I had avoided traffic by having Princess fly me. Unfortunately, one had to follow the law, so I had to walk to the nearest landing platform first and land at the one closest to my apartment. "You two been waiting long?"

Good day, Grace! Medicham saluted and winked. Thank you again for the candy the other day.

"She ate way too much," Maylene said with a hint of disapproval. "Medi has no self-control."

Oh, Maymay, life's too short to worry about self-control, Medicham huffed. Maylene and I glanced at each other for a moment.

My keys jingled as I grabbed them out of my jeans pockets and let both girls in. The rest of Maylene's team was either still working at the Gym or helping in Snowpoint, but she liked bringing at least one Pokemon with her. The two times she had come here, that had been Medicham. The psychic was a riot; she was immature in the best ways and got it on well with Princess and Honey. We both took off our shoes, but she preferred to stay barefoot whereas I had a pair of dad's slippers to use.

They were way too big for me, but they did the trick.

"Hungry?" I glanced to the right, toward the kitchen embedded in the corner of the apartment. "I can make you guys something."

Medicham beamed. She'd already jumped and claimed the couch for herself. Yes—

"Don't, it's okay. We don't want to be a bother," Maylene said.

My shoulders sagged a little as if the wind was taken out of my sails. Every time I tried offering Maylene something—like making food, lending her stuff, or even paying for takeout—she always refused or split the bill. Even the candy I'd given out had all gone to Medicham. Did she not want me to do her favors? She'd been helping me so much, making me her priority to the detriment of her own life. She'd accepted me fully and given me hope. I knew I'd said I'd be using her, but could I truly give nothing else in return?

"Hey. Stop whatever you're thinking about." Maylene turned toward me, and her hand twitched. She'd wanted to touch me. That would have been a breach of protocol. "How bad was it this time?"

"It's—uh, I thought that you might not want me to treat you. 'Cause I'm… me," I mumbled.

"Nope. I already ate before coming here; you know I track what I eat and stuff. Feeding me's a hassle because I plan all my meals ahead of time." Oh. Of course, that was it. That made sense. "Feel better now?"

"Yeah. I'm kind of stupid, huh?" Something tugged the corner of my lips.

"Kind of, or very?" she teased, her lips curving into a smug grin as she leaned in slightly, as if she was daring me to challenge her. "Come on, I have something fun for us to do today— ah, Medi, get off the couch!"

Maylene jumped on the unsuspecting Medicham, and the situation quickly turned to playfighting. Sometimes, I'd wince when it looked like Medi got a hit in that would have broken basically every bone in my body, but Maylene would just shrug it off and laugh. Hell, I was sure Medicham was holding back, but even when fooling around, Maylene was strong enough to pin her down. It looked kind of fun. Once the fighting type finished, I released Honey and Princess so that she would have company, and the Electivire zipped Mimi away from me through magnetism.

"Do you have Streamix on this?" She snatched the remote on the coffee table and turned the TV on. Dad had left the news on this morning before heading to work.

"Oh, we do. We watching a movie?" I sat on the opposite end of the couch, leaning against the armrest.

She brought up the menu and clicked on the streaming service. "Yeah. I hope that's fine? It's not new or anything, but Candice recommended it to me for us to watch. Apparently, it's horror?"

"Huh. I might know it, what's it called?" Her eyes widened a smidge in surprise. "What? Believe it or not, I'm a bit of a movie buff. I went to the cinema with my dad all the time and I watched a bunch, growing up."

"I just didn't expect that. You never brought it up."

"There was a lot going on. I guess now that routine's returning to my life, I can start watching movies again." My fingers tapped idly against my cheek. "I actually had this series about a mute trainer I was watching with…"

With Cecilia.

A heavy silence settled in, at least until Maylene broke it. "You two will manage, I'm sure of it. You've made a lot of progress, and it's only been a week!" The way she always tried to cheer me up didn't consistently work, but it made my heart feel warm. Was having someone to believe in you this powerful? I'd forgotten what it was like. "Let's just have fun today. The movie is called…" she scrolled through the options until she found the horror genre, and then through those movies as well. "There it is! The Frozen Trail!" The movie's poster was a group of five people, a Monferno and a Charmeleon, trudging through a snowstorm with large red eyes looming in the darkness behind them.

"Did you forget the name? You could have typed in the search bar and saved like 2 minutes." We only had an hour and a half together, so every second counted.

"N—no," she stumbled over her words. "Anyway, I'm pressing play—"

"Wait! If it's horror, we should get into the vibes or the genre." I quickly jumped off the couch and closed the curtains everywhere in the house. Then, I barged into my room and interrupted Medicham attempting to ride on Princess' back while Honey was on the ground, laughing and out of breath as Mimi mimicked him with a weird, high-pitched metallic whine.

Grace! Medicham clamored. I've always wanted to fly on a bird!

Princess countered, hurriedly saying that she was too important to be called a mere bird, but once Honey latched on to the word, she started getting relentlessly teased until she dropped Medicham on the ground with a huff.

"You… you three just don't break anything, alright? Have fun."

I snatched the blanket on my bed and left the room, running toward the thermostat to set it to the coldest temperature possible. The entire apartment was dark when I jumped on the couch again, with only light from the television flickering across the living room, casting shadows that danced across the walls and floor.

"The name was related to cold, so I figured I might as well." After burying myself up to my neck under the covers, I passed some to Maylene, who did the same even though she wouldn't be bothered by the cold. "You good with that?"

"Yeah!" she said. "It's kind of fun, I've never watched a movie like this."

"It's immersive, right? C'mon, press play!"

Maylene laughed, her head tilting back slightly. "Someone's excited. I hope you're good with horror." She put the movie on, and a bunch of logos flashed on the screen. "Candice usually just laughs at them while Gardenia hangs onto her for dear life. I'm happy I won't have to be a third wheel for once."

"What about you?" I asked, unable to resist my curiosity.

"Oh, me? I mean, I clear them easy peasy!"

—

Maylene, as it turned out, was not good with horror.

Her entire body tensed, and she instinctively curled up on the couch, drawing her knees to her chest as if making herself smaller could somehow shield her from the terror on screen.

She screamed for dear life as a Garchomp suddenly burst from under the snow. Rows upon rows of sharp teeth the size of my fingers dug into the movie's first victim, and the dragon shook their head until there was nothing left but a mutilated corpse with limbs and organs splattered across the white expanse that was northern Sinnoh. Maylene's hands flew to her face, her knuckles white as she clutched the edge of the blanket and dragged it over her eyes.

Sometimes, I'd feel her brush up against me on accident. The blanket was big enough for the both of us to share enough space, but Maylene jumping in terror every time there was tension in the movie made her move around a lot. Luckily, I was wearing jeans to shield myself from what the contact would do to me most of the time, and her hand had only touched my arm twice.

It was fine whenever it happened by accident. I wasn't going to deduct time for it if the instinctual action of responding to fear led to the contact.

The movie was real good, too. The basic plot was that a helicopter crash off-route had stranded a group of five, with their only Pokemon being a Monferno and Charmeleon which conveniently kept them warm enough not to die from the cold. I assumed the Garchomp had lived on Coronet, had made their way out of the mountain, and was now stalking their victims, killing them one at a time and leaving them alive to come to collect whenever they got hungry. They were easy prey; both Monferno and Charmeleon wouldn't be enough to fight back unless the plot pulled some strange shenanigans.

It was scary for sure, especially the tension-building scenes where you could hear subtle rumbling mixed in with the score that was actually Garchomp moving through the snow. Was there anything scarier than getting stalked by a Garchomp with no way back to civilization but your own two legs? They went really hard on the gore, and while the characters were just meh besides the obvious main couple that would survive at the end, at least the Garchomp was a real actor and not CGI. I assumed they'd actually filmed this in Snowpoint or close to it, so nearly everything was practical effects. The city and its surroundings were excellent for filming winter scenes all year round.

Garchomp, Monferno and Charmeleon. They sure must have paid their trainers a whole lot of money to get such a rare lineup of Pokemon who could actually act.

"I can't believe they'd just kill Mitch like that… we're only twenty minutes in!" Maylene complained with a lasting whine. "I thought we'd see the Garchomp first, and they'd manage to escape, at least for a while."

"Well, he was the one with the least amount of backstory and talked about his wife and kids in the opening act, he was basically condemned to die," I said, glancing at her.

The subtle glow of the TV flashed across her face, and she was already preparing herself to shield her eyes at the next jumpscare. Normally, I'd be hoping there wouldn't be that many— not because being scared wasn't fun, but because too many really cheapened the impact and kind of ruined the movie. They'd handled it perfectly here, revealing Garchomp for the first time after having left clues for attentive viewers to catch without holding their hand.

But this time, I figured I'd be kind of okay with it.

Part of me wanted to ask her to practice right now, a desperate idea that hung on the tip of my tongue. It would technically be fine because she'd be the one touching me. Plus, Gardenia and Candice did it when watching movies, and they were friends. It was normal. The issue was that I couldn't be the one to ask because that'd breach a line and go past a point I was willing to cross. There was this tense feeling within me, a subtle squeeze that made me conscious of every breath. A warmth bubbling within me despite the cold temperatures that had spread throughout the apartment.

It wasn't a bad feeling.

The movie finished with a runtime of one hour and ten minutes with my expectations completely subverted. The main couple who I thought would live actually died, along with every human in the movie, leaving only Monferno and Charmeleon alive for the last forty percent of the film as they desperately clung to life, the flame on their tails dimming as the movie went on. As it turned out, they'd been the two main characters all along, and their scenes were devoid of any dialogue or subtitles, meaning people had to use body language and guess what they were telling each other. Even I couldn't understand, since my empathy didn't work through screens.

It was extremely enjoyable to watch, even if only Monferno survived Garchomp's onslaught in the end thanks to Charmeleon's sacrifice. He'd evolved into a CGI Charizard and bought just enough time for Monferno to jump into a half-frozen river that washed him up in Snowpoint with only a broken arm, leg, and hypothermia.Unauthorized duplication: this tale has been taken without consent. Report sightings.

"That was fun!" I said as the credits rolled. "Honestly, one of the best horrors I've watched recently. I wonder if Candice watched and recc'ed it because it was a locally-made movie. What'd you think—"

Ah.

She was crying. Not full-on tears, but her eyes were wet and she sniffled as she dragged herself out of the covers and wiped her eyes. "That was depressing. Good, but depressing."

I sighed. "Right."

I understood her. It was the kind of movie I'd usually cry at, but it just hadn't… made me feel as strongly. Yes, I was sad, and yes, I'd gotten scared, but maybe movies were just that, now. Movies. Fake. The veneer of reality one could pretend was there when watching just hadn't hit me at all. Nothing had immersed me enough to make me think 'these are people, not actors.'

"I really thought they'd escape together. Why did Candice recommend this? It completely killed the vibe…" Maylene grabbed her phone to check the time, and then I almost thought she'd start texting Candice before she put it away. "I bet she was laughing when she texted me about it! She knew it'd make me cry!"

"Maybe she thought you'd enjoy it anyway, right?" I scooted myself a little toward her. "It was good. That scene where Garchomp destroyed their camp and bit off that guy's leg and he had to bleed out for miles over the snow? It's so good!"

Maylene rolled her eyes. "You'd get on well with her for any horror flicks."

"Probably, but watching with you was… cool; your reactions were fun." I found myself tightening the covers around me. "I wish we could do this more often. Hanging out."

She gave me a knowing smile. "You know we can't. It has to be other people pulling you up, not just me," she explained as she had numerous times. "If I'm your answer for everything, then I'm just turning into your new Cecilia. Without the dating part," she was thankfully quick to add.

"I know. I'm the one who actually has to swim to shore; you're just keeping me from drowning."

She snapped her fingers. "Exactly! God, you're good with analogies."

I was bummed to hear it, but her knowing when to stop was a good thing. I was horrible at self-control while she actually enforced the limits. That was what I needed. While Maylene went to readjust the thermostat, I opened the curtains again and went to check on our Pokemon. Medicham, as Princess explained it, had enjoyed the cold so much she'd started napping after stealing my bed. The Togekiss and her brother had started taking bets on what they could do without Medicham waking up, which, as it turned out, was a lot. I assumed Honey was the one who had squiggled the lines on her face with permanent marker while Princess had been in the midst of tickling her nose with the tip of her wing just as I'd walked in. Mimi had been staring out my window with a fascinated look and looking at Jubilife's afternoon life pass them by.

I apologized to Maylene for their behavior when she walked in behind me, but she didn't seem to mind. Even Medicham took it all in good fun and enjoyed having stars drawn around her eyes.

"You guys can take the living room," Maylene said. "Grace and I are gonna use the room for a bit."

All three Pokemon slowly walked out— I rubbed Princess' head and Honey's arm when they did— and Mimi remained transfixed by the city. Maylene closed the door behind them. My throat felt dry when she turned toward me. Her mouth opened, and she asked in a whisper that carried across my bedroom and tickled my ears:

"We have enough time; want to practice today?"

—

Practice was odd.

During our second session after the first in the bathroom, Maylene had backed off due to the reaction I'd had when she had tried touching my face and done my wrist instead. It was a gesture I appreciated greatly; it'd be better to slowly ramp up instead of jumping to the most extreme options right away. The problem was that while I was always anxious before it happened, and the start was always unpleasant, making me fight my instincts to not pull away out of fear of sullying Maylene, part of me couldn't help but look forward to it.

It was in moments like these, right before we began, that the tension was at its highest— so thick I struggled to take anything but shallow breaths, and I had to stay focused by biting my lip. Maylene loomed in front of me, face slightly red and looking right into my eyes. Where was she doing to do it today? The hand? Maybe my shoulder? My thighs? No, she couldn't— I was wearing jeans. Or could she, anyway? What if she asked me? My mind raced at every possibility as I pressed myself back against the wall and gripped the side of my desk with a slick palm. She was kind of cornering me, yet I could barely look away; I was caught in the intensity of her gaze.

"Are you ready?" she asked, slightly breathless. She was nervous just like I was, something that reassured me slightly. "Remember the safe word."

My head bobbed up and down without my doing; I was in no state of mind to speak right now. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw both of her hands moving in unison toward my waist. They slipped under the hem of my shirt—

My entire body shivered, knocking over a cup full of pens and pencils all over my desk and floor. It was as if a jolt of electricity surged through me, setting my body alight. I could literally feel my heartbeat in my ears. Maylene stopped, waiting to see if I'd say anything to stop her, but I didn't. Instead, I held strong as she moved deeper under my shirt up my waist and then kept her hands firmly in place. It had to be skin-on-skin, or it didn't count. The treatment was obviously working. The period of time it took for it to go from me worrying about Maylene's safety to whatever this feeling was grew tinier and tinier, and today was no exception. To her credit, Maylene stayed very professional. She kept far enough away from me to need to have her arms fully extended to touch me, and…

"Is this good?" she softly asked.

Maylene squeezed a little harder, and I forgot what I'd just been thinking about. Her fingers traced lightly along my waist, their warmth seeping into my skin. I could feel her other hand draw contours along the edges of my scars. There was no way the thermostat had already adjusted the temperature enough for me to sweat, yet I was anyway. An unknown amount of minutes passed when a dangerous little thought wandered into my head as Maylene's hands snaked further behind me and onto my back, meaning she had needed to get a smidge closer.

Was I enjoying this?

I was. There was something freeing about being so vulnerable with her; something freeing about showing her all of me, countless flaws included, and yet still having her look at me like this. Like I still deserved to be loved. Touch me like I still deserved to be touched and wasn't poisonous. Was it okay to like this? Did it go too far? I'd enjoyed my therapy with Aliyah and looked forward to speaking with her; wasn't this just another form of therapy?

Maylene was close enough for her hands to touch behind me, now, and finally, I found myself looking away from her intense gaze. She let out a little sound, almost demanding, to tell me to keep staring so I could keep my confidence, and it was impossible for me to consider not locking eyes again. The ends of her breath tickled my face—

The alarm rang in her pocket.

"Annnd, done," she sighed.

Immediately, her warmth left me, leaving only traces. Imprints of purity where her fingers and palms had sunk into my skin to fix me. Soon, it'd be as if it had never been there in the first place. I could see the darkness lurking on her fingers, palms and forearms. They were already fading; they always went quicker, these days. The ten minutes did as well; I couldn't believe that was it, already. My legs were numb. I used the last of my energy to shuffle over to my bed and fell on top of it as if I'd just ran a marathon.

"You did good today," Maylene said behind me. "You nearly looked at me the entire time and everything; good job. I'm proud of you." My stomach fluttered. "You thirsty? I'm feeling a bit thirsty." She glanced at the door. "I can get you some water."

"Yes, please." I stared down again so I wouldn't see her, and my voice was muffled through my pillow.

I heard her open the door, letting in our Pokemon's chatter, but I was too out of it to focus. My head was spinning. Surprisingly, she closed it behind her, and for a moment, there were no steps. It was like a bucket of cold water dropped on my head. Had I fucked up in some way? Made a sound that had creeped her out during practice? I—I needed to fix this. I—

It must have taken nearly ten seconds for her to start walking toward the kitchen. Hearing her move soothed my nerves enough to stay seated on the bed instead of barging out there in a panic and apologizing for whatever it was that I did wrong. Maylene came back with two glasses of tap water, though she'd already been drinking from hers. My hands pressed against the cool glass to center myself, and I took a sip of water.

"Thanks for helping, as always," I said now that I was well enough to speak. "What time is it? How long do you have left?"

After downing her glass, Maylene started picking up my knocked-down pen and pencils. "I took a look at the time in the living room. We've got thirteen minutes left, but I think I'm gonna head out early."

My body froze; the glass nearly slipped out of my hands. "Was it something I did, or…?" I asked, unsure of myself.

Maylene smiled. "Good. You asked this time instead of thinking the worst all on your own." She finished putting the cup upright and looked at me like someone would a wounded child. Full of care and a desire to help. "No, it was nothing you did, but I think it'd be good for you. Sometimes, things happen, and people have to leave early, y'know? It'd be good for you to learn. Better to get you used to it; it's just thirteen minutes. Less, now."

"That's fair." I stood up to see her out. "Thanks for swinging by. Kadabra gonna pick you up?"

"...I guess I'll have to stand in front of the door until he does," she slowly realized, hand drifting up to her forehead. "No talking to me, though. Sorry. Oh, and by the way, I was thinking."

"Hm?"

Unwilling to leave them unattended, I scooped up Mimi in my hands before we left my bedroom.

"You know how I told you that you should have other people to practice with?" she asked. Right. I hadn't even told anyone about this problem yet since I'd been hoping it would go away just with Maylene's help. "Since you haven't really gotten started on that, I figured that the session after the next one should be done by someone other than me."

I could only muster a weak "yeah," however my displeasure must have shown on my face even though I knew she was right.

"I know it's gonna be tough." She grabbed my hand and squeezed—

We both immediately pulled away. She had forgotten that wasn't supposed to happen.

"Shit. Sorry." Her expression looked uneasy rather than apologetic. Like she was unsettled she had actually fucked up. "Um, as I was saying, it's going to be hard; I know you're in a bad place right now. But I'm giving you a session's warning in advance so it doesn't feel like the world's falling underneath you. This has nothing to do with anything you did or what I feel, okay? It's just better this way, yeah?"

"No, no, I get it." I did get it. But how could she make me feel these weird things and then tell me I had to get it from someone else? How was that fair?

Maylene's hands touched one another, as if she needed a distraction. "You look like it hurts a lot, though."

"I'm sorry. I'm trying, and it's genuinely gotten a lot easier since we talked at the ceremony. Thanks for sticking with me, still." It was difficult to believe that she was still here helping me after all of this. That she still loved me. Yet I knew she did. "So… see you in four days at eight pm?" I'd memorized the schedule, so there was no need to check my phone."Don't forget, it's in Twinleaf."

"It's gonna be tough finding a Kadabra who's been there," Maylene jokingly complained. "I'll figure it out, though." She turned toward the living room. "Medi! Time to go!"

After Medicham told my Pokemon her goodbyes, Maylene and I stood there awkwardly for a few moments. This always happened when one of us had to leave; we kind of didn't know how to do it without feeling like something was off. This time around, it ended with two stiff nods and a wave on my part. The door closed, and I waited in the living room, glancing at the clock occasionally as I caught up with Honey and Princess' games and what I'd missed with Medicham.

It seemed a little more difficult to do things now that Maylene was gone, and I had a few hours until dad came back home. Honey poked my shoulder and asked what we were going to do now, and I smiled at him.

"Guess it's time to wash you guys. You haven't taken baths in a while."

Princess immediately screamed at her sibling for getting her into this mess, which reminded me of some kids' reactions to the people who'd tell teachers they'd forgotten to check if the class had done their homework. To make herself feel better, she threw Sunshine under the bus and demanded he be subject to this 'torture.'

Honestly, she just hated getting wet because it made her lose all of her volume, and it exposed how skinny she was to the world. She sure looked a lot less majestic that way.

"Don't worry, Sunshine's gonna get his share too!" I laughed. Yeah, he'd just gotten out of the Center and didn't really need his scales cleaned, but it'd be fun to bond. "Then we'll go out."

This time, it was Mimi who chimed excitedly, though the other two were also intrigued.

"I don't know where yet. But… maybe we can go train again, yeah?"

—

It was always difficult for Maylene to go to work as if nothing had happened after spending time with Grace. Her mind would always be weighed down by guilt, as if leaving Grace behind was somehow wrong, even though she knew it was for the best. There was something in the way Grace looked up at her, a look so vulnerable, as if her entire world would crumble if Maylene walked out that door. It was a gaze that tugged at her heart, making her want to stay just a little longer, no matter how many responsibilities awaited her.

Those eyes were almost hypnotic, and in that moment, Maylene could fully grasp what Cecilia had gone through. It wasn't just a look; it was a silent plea, a tender vulnerability that was impossible to turn away from—especially when you loved her. That was why Maylene had grabbed her hand on accident. She'd wanted nothing more but to call Grace a good girl for reassurance and to tell her she'd stay until her father came home from work in exchange for having other people practice with her as if that would be some kind of compromise and not just giving in to her.

And it would probably feel really good. Giving in to her. For a while, at least, until it inevitably blew up.

Saying no felt like a betrayal, a cruelty she wasn't sure she could ever inflict until Maylene stood there for long enough, snapped out of her trance, and remembered this was for Grace's own good.

Now, it was back to work.

Luckily for her, she'd finished helping the 7th badge Pokemon train today in hopes of pushing more of them to be usable for 8th badge battles. As Veilstone was the first Gym reopened, and they took more and more trainers every day, Maylene expected the Gym wouldn't have enough to tackle the flurry of 7 badgers hoping to make it to the Conference who had saved her for their 8th badge in hopes of getting an easier fight. Now, all she'd need to do for the rest of the day was refresh her email, look into getting some new fighting types in Maniac Tunnel tomorrow, and harass the League for more money to pay all of her employees on time this Friday.

It was boring, idle work, but that was also part of a Gym Leader's duties and could be enjoyable if you saw it as taking care of your community. Any distraction was better than reminiscing about today's practice. If Maylene thought about it too much, she wouldn't be able to even read right.

She was mildly melancholic that other people would have to be involved soon. It was for Grace's well-being, but practice was… it was their thing. Maylene would be sad to see less and less of it as the weeks went on. For their next session in Twinleaf, she'd have to make her ten minutes count.

It was okay to be a little selfish, right?

A subtle vibration from her phone on her desk snapped her out of her thoughts. Luckily, it wasn't Grace relapsing—they weren't supposed to contact each other outside of emergencies (if Grace was getting really bad thoughts; she had revealed her history of self-harm), set hours or to facilitate meetings for their sessions—it was Candice. Reading her name on her screen usually would have made Maylene smile, but the ice type Gym Leader had been relentless in getting 'updates' on what was happening between Maylene and Grace this past week.

Maylene was somewhat to blame. She'd kept telling her about some things to cheer her up, even more than Gardenia sometimes. Maylene had obviously respected Grace's wishes and not told them how deep their bond went; all they knew was that they'd 'mended' things at the ceremony and were now sometimes hanging out and talking, but less than they had before.

Maylene exhaled before answering. "Candice. Aren't you supposed to be meeting with some—"

"Yes! The Kanto-Johto reps to assign them to different jobs to help fix up the port. I finished all of that already!" she yelled so loudly it was as if she was trying to eat her phone. She was surprised it had gone that quickly, but despite how Candice acted, Maylene knew she wasn't the kind of person to not take her duties seriously when she couldn't afford to. "How'd it go with Grace? Did she enjoy the movie?"

"Why'd you give us a movie like that, anyway?" Maylene asked, dodging the question. "I thought it was gonna be a cheesy kind of horror, not 'ruin your day' horror."

Candice snickered. "You don't know what it's like to rizz someone, my dear apprentice. First of all, Grace loves movies—"

"You knew that?!"

"—and I figured you'd jump in her arms, or she'd comfort you while you were crying or something," Candice spoke over her. "Second of all, it's also just a great movie?! Like, hello?! Real boon for the Snowpoint movie industry these past few years! We're no Pokestar Studio, but I'm hoping to get there in my tenure!"

Maylene sighed as she forwarded an email to Sunnyshore's Gym about some issue about a reported herd of Ponyta arriving from off-route onto route 214 within the next week or so. It was a situation the Rangers would most likely deal with, but they were better safe than sorry. Just knowing wouldn't hurt, and Sunyshore trainers were so coddled a few might do something stupid in hopes of getting their hands on a new fire type and get burned.

"She did like the movie," Maylene admitted. "Really like it. Thanks for the suggestion." Most of her commentary had been about the technical aspects of scenes or the themes behind the story, though. A little funny to hear when someone's body was being shredded by a Garchomp's teeth. It was endearing in a way, and nice to listen to her talk about something normally and not berate herself for just existing. Maylene was sure she would have paid more attention if she hadn't been fighting for her life. "Since I have you here, I want to talk to you about something."

"Sure thing, Maymay. Shoot."

Her fingers traced the edge of her laptop. "I… I don't think you should keep pushing this narrative about Grace and me becoming a thing. It's not happening."

Sure, Grace and Cecilia were temporarily broken up, but the temporary was the important bit. The thought of it being final terrified Grace constantly to the point that she'd vent about maybe not being good enough even when she was 'fixed.' Her intention was to get back with Cecilia eventually, and Maylene encouraged that. Sometimes, especially during practice, Grace would look at her in ways that gave her ideas that maybe, just maybe, there'd be a chance if Maylene pushed for it. If she just leaned in and took her lips right then and there. But she didn't want to be a homewrecker. She wasn't doing this to take advantage of two broken girls, and so far, she'd found restraining herself from going that far to be easy.

"If you want me to, I'll stop," Candice finally said. "But it's giving a little bit of mixed signals, yeah? You're literally having dates with this girl every few days, and her girlfriend's nowhere to be seen. She helped you a lot with Oscar, right? And the three of you talked and spent a decent amount of time together. Aren't you practicing to show her different colors of aura? I honestly thought something had happened here, like a big ole pile of lesbians. You never did that for me when I asked you."

"S—slow down. You asked me that out of curiosity, and you say a bunch of unserious stuff all the time!" Maylene fought back. "And yes, she was the main reason I stood up to him back at the ceremony," Maylene said with a slight smile. "Cecilia's just busy, at the moment. She's reconnecting with her team on her own." That was the official narrative Maylene was going for, at least.

"Well, if you want to lie to your dear friend Candice, I'll let you off the hook for now, missus," she spoke with a huff. "I'll stop bringing it up. Just… if what you're saying is true and nothing's changed in their relationship, then you ought to back off, right? Like I know I joke around a lot and stuff, but…"

Maylene felt a pit form in her stomach. "It's not what you think, okay? There's—there's a reason for all of this; I just can't get into it; it isn't my place. If she's ever fine with me saying this stuff, then I'll tell you, 'kay?"

Maylene hoped her friends wouldn't think she was a bad person because of a misunderstanding. If it came to that, she'd have to ask Grace to tell them again. Grace was really worrying about their reactions for nothing. They didn't have to go in-depth; they'd just have to briefly mention the break, the co-dependency issues, and their practice sessions. Then, they would understand easily.

Candice let out a long, curious hum with a hint of suspicion. "Don't just get hurt, and try to not hurt others, okay?"

Maylene couldn't muster a verbal response. "Mhm."

—

There were plenty of areas to train in Jubilife. Hundreds upon hundreds of arenas to make use of, filled to the brim with hobbyists and professional trainers alike. Sometimes, they'd hold tournaments that dad used to bring me to, and I remembered being so excited to see them— as if my eyes were so transfixed on each fight I barely remembered to blink— until I held Princess in my arms for the first time and I pictured her in that situation, taking hit after hit until she was a bloodied heap on the ground with her Togepi egg fractured to pieces.

Times changed, and quickly. One year after that, Princess would be fighting her first battle against a trainer with a Shinx south of the city. The feeling of ecstasy after a win was one I hadn't felt in a long while. Not when all of my recent fights had been to kill people, most of them just because they were in my way. I hadn't come here to fight anyone yet. The odds of finding someone who'd give me a good battle here were basically zero, given that anyone with eight badges would probably rather hide what they were developing for the delayed Conference.

Instead, I'd come here to watch young trainers give it all they got on battles with no stakes to remember what that was like. The thrill of a fight; the way your body felt so electric when one of your tactics paid off, and you could just bask in the moment; how you forgot that the world around you bled away, you forgot anything else existed and could only see the stretch of arena ahead of you and nothing else.

The results were… mixed. Not because the battles were boring, or anything—Sunshine and I were currently watching a girl's Staravia lose to another teen's insanely skilled Venonat, who would leave clusters of Rage Powder to lead Staravia astray. I was pretty sure the bug was somehow combining this with a form of Confuse Ray to make the Staravia see things, given how it was throwing Air Cutters at nothing while his trainer constantly yelled at him in an attempt to aim toward Venonat while Psybeams constantly attempted to shoot him out of the sky. It was kind of a baby's first illusion, which would be incredible given that both these kids had three badges.

I did still get excited when I saw things like that. People finding different ways to use moves, or how no two Pokemon fought the same. For example, this girl's Staravia; he was obviously newly evolved, by the awkward way he sometimes overshot the distance he planned to fly or struggled to stop. That meant that his trainer mostly relied on moves at a distance out of fear he'd mess up. Things like Air Cutter, Gust, or Whirlwind. The issue was that he'd spread the Rage Powder all over the arena due to this, but I assumed his trainer assumed she'd be able to make quick work of a Venonat before it became an issue. She had been wrong.

Anyway.

I'd seen another Staravia fight earlier (the species was one of the most popular flying types a Sinnohan trainer could have), and that Pokemon had been turned into a complete berserker whose only goal was to get as many hits in by getting up close and personal. If that wasn't enough, Endeavor would do the trick, and I assumed it often turned a loss into a one-to-one trade if it caught opponents off-guard. The move was one of the relatively easy to learn but much more difficult to master, yet that trainer had put all of his time into it and defied the odds.

There was beauty in that. How people and Pokemon's way of fighting was so shaped by their experiences that none of them were the same. Sometimes similar, maybe, but never the same. Sunshine snorted when Staravia was finally brought down by a final Psybeam, and I nudged his arm to tell him to be respectful in public, at least. His scales were so clean and smooth they were nearly shiny, something he didn't like. According to him, it made him appear weaker because it looked like he didn't regularly fight. Like some kind of 'pet' Pokemon.

His words, not mine.

It had been easy to settle back into a rhythm with him, and he didn't care much about any of my relationship drama besides the fact that it made me feel bad and slow down. He'd told me that I should focus on fighting instead of all these childish impulses, and it was at times like these that I remembered he was a bitter old dragon who'd only known violence and fighting for over seventy years. One couldn't just ignore what they were feeling by throwing themselves into something else and giving up everything else, or at least it wasn't sustainable.

I still loved him dearly, though. And I knew this was a partnership, and he wouldn't want to stay idle. Not just him, either. Nearly all of my Pokemon were eager to get back into the groove of training again but just hadn't said anything because they hadn't wanted to distress me. He was just the only one who didn't care about being blunt, and unlike Sweetheart, Buddy couldn't rein in his words.

The dragon asked me if I had gotten what I wanted by coming here, which mainly was inspiration. My notebook was full of ideas scribbled down in the last week or so, but none of them had clicked like the ones I'd come up with before Coronet. Like Vine Terrain, the different ways to utilize Night Shade, or Dark Sandstorm. The closest I'd gotten back to that feeling were concepts for Princess' cutting moves, but that was far off.

"Not really; it was fun, though. I actually have something I want to talk to you about regarding training."

He perked up at the notion, shell brightening a smidge. The glower made a few people behind him give him a wide berth. At the side of the battlefield, the two trainers we'd been looking at shook each other's hands, and the girl bitterly handed her opponent a few thousand Pokedollars. Must have been a high-stakes match.

I sighed. "Let's head out."

Unfortunately, Sunshine was one of these Pokemon not exactly allowed on most streets of Jubilife, so he'd have to make do with waiting in his Pokeball for now. Princess and I would be flying down south for this one, close to where Angel had first unveiled his Vine Terrain at full force. He actually was one I also wanted to speak to regarding training as well.

The thing about flying was that you saw so much more of the world, spread out below you, and that sometimes included spotting intriguing events. Like a gathering of dark clouds above a slightly wooded area followed by a flurry of bolts of lightning slamming into the ground below. The sound hit me a few seconds later, and I soothed Princess by rubbing a hand on her head. It wasn't the first time we spotted an attack like this from above, but it was certainly the largest of its kind. Was some big-shot training in our spot? That looked like something someone with eight badges would come up with, especially if it was sustainable. I was a little anxious about the woods catching on fire, though I suspect I used that as an excuse to go check out who this was. Any trainer this powerful knew to not damage the area they were in too much whenever they trained. They drilled that into you in school, and if you got caught, you'd get a hefty fine depending on how much land you ruined and what the Rangers had to do to fix it. Already, I noticed someone in uniform on a Tropius keeping watch of the area.

A thick barrier appeared around Princess as she waited for an opening to dive down. When she did, I found a familiar face among a clearing. Marley from piano class with an Electrode brimming with energy, the electricity around her pulsating like a beating heart. A Floatzel was a few hundred feet away, extinguishing the few fires that had appeared before they could damage the woods. The air still smelled like ozone and tickled my nostrils.

Marley from piano class…

Marley from piano class?! Again, the technique on that Electrode was definitely some high-level stuff! The electric type looked a little exhausted, heaving for every breath as she subtly rolled back and forth. The storm above us ended, and Marley's eyes narrowed until she was glaring at me.

"Are you spying on me?" she asked. What? She was the one who was in my spot— "Damn it, I knew I should have waited to train at night." Electrode sneered at me, her species' familiar smile nowhere to be seen, and she asked her trainer what they should do.

I swallowed, forcing myself not to go for my Pokeballs, and I kept petting Princess as I whispered to her to relax. That we were safe, that they didn't mean that they'd kill us; no one who was normal thought like that. Floatzel was… hiding behind one of the trees. Not very well, given that I could see his anxiety-ridden tail writhe around.

"I'm… sorry?" I hesitantly said. "I'm not here to spy; I came here to train with my team. I usually swing around here whenever I'm in Jubilife, and I've never seen you."

Marley huffed, turning her head away—she'd been looking at my Togekiss. "Train? How many badges do you even have?"

Did she really not know? How offline was she? Was it possible to be even more offline than I was? I'd never seen her with a phone, and I could see the edge of a rolled-up paper map past her backpack's zipper like this was the 90s or some other ancient time.

"Seven." Her eyes widened slightly when I answered as if she was surprised a trainer of my caliber was just hanging out in her piano class. That was my line. "Like I said, I didn't come here to spy on you," I continued and took a step forward. "I wanted to talk to my team and come up with some new stuff."

"Uhuh," she said, clearly not believing me.

"Your Electrode sure packs a punch, though," I added. If her Pokemon were this strong, why did she save food and live in the worst part of Jubilife? She could be rich if she wanted. "What's that move called? Is it, like, an ultimate technique?" Maybe something like Vine Terrain was for Angel? "It's a sustained thunderstorm that just keeps hitting with continuous Thunderbolts all over the field, right? I assume they hone in on your opponent, too. It's pretty sweet, especially since it's scaleable with Thunder and eventually even Zap Cannon. Hard to imagine so many of those, though. You might melt any battlefield off."

Her arms shot straight down to her sides, fists clenching so tightly that her knuckles turned whiter than they already were. "You said you didn't come to spy on me, but you fish around for what move that was?!" Her voice turned deep again when she yelled, and her hands covered her mouth. "Ugh. Whatever," Marley muttered. "I'll leave you this area. I thought the fact that it was nearly off the route and that the giant thunderstorm would be enough not to come across anyone, but clearly, I was wrong."

"Wait! Do you have a phone number or something? We should train together; this is like, the perfect opportunity!" I asked as she recalled her Electrode and Floatzel (by aiming at his tail), then released an Arcanine. Her fur gleamed in the sunlight like a coat of molten gold, and I could see the dense muscle beneath it. She was far bulkier than Justin's. You'd think she was part fighting type.

The fire type immediately rolled on her back, paws up in the air and tongue hanging from her mouth as she demanded pets. "Arcanine, not now. You're embarrassing me in front of a potential opponent…"

Princess and I just blinked at her, not knowing what to say. Eventually, Arcanine got the idea, and Marley climbed up on her back, face red in embarrassment and anger. "Don't tell this to anyone. Especially not Jess!" Her voice got a little louder just then. "Act like none of this happened in class."

She touched Arcanine's neck twice, and the fire type began to run at a trot, slowly speeding up until she became nothing but a smear of red and gold against the world. I sighed as I released the rest of my team.

So much for a training partner.